Linda immediately went to her, held her and let her cry until she could talk. The piece of paper my mom was holding slipped to the floor. I was afraid...it was bad news about Ricky, but I was wrong. It was a letter from college that said I wasnt good enough to get in. That meant one thing, I had lost my college deferment and could be drafted. We got mom to calm down, and then go lay down for awhile. Linda looked as worried as mom did. Carl, she started. Look Linda, its no big deal. So Im not. I decide to ask around the other departments and see their libraries. I have to walk daily while I mend. Here in the midst of files/folders/stacks/reams/drawers /boxes of material all neatly sorted/ bound/classified/labeled/collated/cross-indexed and stacked to the ceiling, I wind my way around here like a Govt. Spook doing research. I can do this in my sleep. Even drunk-sorta. Stoned-nah, hated that. Give me some coffee and get outta my way. I'll eat when I get around to it. Shit. I woulda. It meant the end of my dreams, so I hung on hoping that you'd get tired or I'd be able to keep going for as long you did. After two hours it was obvious that neither of those was going to happen. I was worn out and you looked as fresh as a daisy. -- "I'm very ashamed that rather than acknowledging your superiority, I clung to a tiny shred of unrealistic hope. I refused to ask you to stop. I stupidly thought that if I never gave up, then you'd eventually have to. It took me hours to realize how. She had dated Kevin for about two months. He worked in her building, but they met at a street vendor’s wagon during a break. She had managed to drop a big gloob of ice cream on some file folders he had laid on the top of the stainless steel cart. There were apologies, then small talk, and somehow they wound up exchanging phone numbers and email addresses. On their first date, he took her to dinner, then a movie, then to an ice cream parlor where he shoved the placemats aside and sat their bowls.
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